051107

Today is the day after my birthday. I could still remember the days when I was still back there in cell group when I celebrated my 21^st birthday with the rest of my close friends and my cell group members. There was really nothing like it.

I went back to Mannheim yesterday to cook Hainan's Chicken Rice for the rest of my friends in Mannheim. Although the rice and the chicken was really good I should say, I did not spend enough time in Mannheim to enjoying it. I reached Mannheim at about 11 am and I had to leave at about 4pm in the afternoon. It was really sad. I actually felt like crying, because never did I feel so miserable on my birthday. I would rather not be reminded, that my birthday is coming, than to be reminded and felt miserable that no one is celebrating it with me. I miss church, I miss her and now, I miss the fact that I am not able to be home with my family to celebrate my birthday. Haiz.

Life in Germany has taken a totally new level of challenge in my life. Coming to Germany was already stepping out of the comfort zone for me. Little Being in Konstanz is like the ultimate form of stepping out of the comfort zone for me. I will definitely not do this ever again. The living standard is high, the people are not really as friendly as I thought, and everything is very old fashioned. I wonder why. I have always thought that the Germans are very modern. I mean, the cars are so popular in Singapore. Why are they still so backward in their thinking? This should not be the way. This was what made my life in Germany so difficult.

GOD has been very important to me in my life and HE is especially important in my life right now. I really feel very alone right now. I mean, no friends, not even German speaking friends. I mean, I do not really mind if Sayuki or some other friends who are German speaking are together with me right now in Konstanz, but it is just not so. It is just so lonely. I really want to go visit the church this Sunday right here in Konstanz. I do not really care if it is a charismatic church or it is just a traditional church. I want to be in the presence of GOD, because after all, GOD's presence is found in the church. I believe that I will be touched when I go to the church in Konstanz this Sunday, just like the days when I was in Mannheim.:)

The no guitar days are over. I am going to visit one second hand shop this Saturday together with Ena and I am going to buy my first guitar, my German guitar.:) Haha! I believ that I can use that guitar to pick up more skill and hopefully come back as a even more anointed and skillful guitarist! I really want to glory GOD in my guitar playing, and I believe that it will come to pass, because GOD has given me a gift, a gift that I will never lose, a gift that will leave my life totally transformed. I believe that GOD is going to use me even more and more for His kingdom. I believe that whatever that I am doing here in Germany has a cause. Whatever that I am doing right here in Germany is supposed to mount me to become a better man that I already am. GOD USE ME!!